The Reddit IAMA Quiz

So there's a rather cool section on Reddit called r/iama, where certain noteworthy people present themselves for questioning and people are encouraged to ask them 'anything' - which Redditors tend to take to heart in a no-punches-pulled kind of way. It's good reading - though each one could use with trimming. As a quiz, I'm presenting ten of these particular individuals who have submitted AMAs, and one particular question that was posed to each. Your job? Guess which question was asked to whom. Easy, eh?

1. A career waiter
2. The creator of Ren & Stimpy
3. An English police officer
4. A male kindergarten teacher
5. A character actor who has appeared in over 200 movies and TV shows
6. A four-year-old
7. A person who has no tongue
8. A former ice cream truck owner
9. A gay man who went through religious aversion therapy
10. Ken Jennings, 74-time Jeopardy! winner

And here are the ten questions, lettered. Mix 'n' match!

1. Have you ever been or do you worry about being accused of being a pedophile?
2. As a content owner, how do you feel about your works being available for free online?
3. Do you still have nightmares about the music?
4. Were you trained to shoot a gun?
5. Did you ever think that the 'answer in question form' thing was unnecessary bullcrap?
6. What's the scariest thing ever?
7. Did you ever track down the cat?
8. Did you start out as an aspiring actor and just never get there?
9. How does "funny" work?
10. How much porn did they make you watch?

So... ruminate at your own tempo. And then click below to see the answers. Or rather click on the links to see the answers. In the meantime, click below to see the right questions.

» Answers - click here «

1. A career waiter - h. Did you start out as an aspiring actor and just never get there?
2. The creator of Ren & Stimpy - b. As a content owner, how do you feel about your works being available for free online?
3. An English police officer -d. Were you trained to shoot a gun?
4. A male kindergarten teacher - a. Have you ever been or do you worry about being accused of being a pedophile?
5. A character actor who has appeared in over 200 movies and TV shows - i. How does "funny" work?
6. A four-year-old - f. What's the scariest thing ever?
7. A person who has no tongue - g. Did you ever track down the cat?
8. A former ice cream truck owner - c. Do you still have nightmares about the music?
9. A gay man who went through religious aversion therapy - j. How much porn did they make you watch?
10. Ken Jennings, 74-time Jeopardy! winner - e. Did you ever think that the 'answer in question form' thing was unnecessary bullcrap?

Bungle Jerry Takes On Sporcle

So do you know Sporcle, the online quiz site? It's pretty decent. There are fun quizzes to be had, and lots of iffy ones too. I decided to go as random as possible, by clicking on the 'random quiz' button and doing whichever quiz it gave me, regardless if it was something I knew or not. How'd I do? Not bad this time out, as it happens:

1. http://www.sporcle.com/games/mlbperfectgames.php - This one is about MLB pitchers who have pitched Perfect Games - something that is seemingly pretty tough to do since it only happens every few years and only happened twice between 1908 and 1964. I know nothing about baseball, so I spent a few minutes guessing random common Anglo and Hispanic surnames. I got 1/20, having blagged '(Randy) Johnson'. I didn't get the awesome name Catfish Hunter, or Kenny Rogers, who knows when to hold 'em.
2. http://www.sporcle.com/games/rickastleywillnever.php - This jokey and buggy quiz wants you to fill in the chorus to Rick Astley's 'Never Gonna Give You Up'. You get a minute to deal with its poor presentation and answer six lines (the two 'ands' are fused together, annoyingly). I got 6/6 though, because I like that song unironically.
3. http://www.sporcle.com/games/googlebird/rolling_stone_cover_individual_artist - Rolling Stone covers, name the person depicted. Pretty easy, really, since few were especially modern. I completely blanked on 50 Cent to the point that I came up with 'Curtis Jackson' (it doesn't accept it) before his nom de plume. Cheated in the end, though, after more than a minute wasted, so while it showed 40, let's be honest and call it 39/40.
4. http://www.sporcle.com/games/rockgolf/Shorter_Shortz - This was tough enough just to figure out what they were getting at. It's a rough 'crossword', in a really loose sense of the word. I completed it, which to them means I got 110/110. Woo-hoo!
5. http://www.sporcle.com/games/buckleppin/theworldaccordingtozuckerberg - This rather lame idea presents book or play synopses as 'Facebook updates'. Whatever, but the choices were well-considered. I'm not the most well-read person, so I'm pleased with my 9/17. Two of the answers I'd never even heard of.
6. http://www.sporcle.com/games/internet.php - Countries with the most internet users. In other words, name as many first world and/or well populated countries as you can in four minutes. I got 20/20.
7. http://www.sporcle.com/games/Jonilase/AlsoOnYourKeyboard - A silly quiz that puns on the name of computer keys like 'control' and 'tab'. I got 13/13, which entailed wild guessing on the 'hurricane' one (there are only so many named keys on the keyboard).
8. http://www.sporcle.com/games/moviepostersii.php - Square chunks of movie posters, you guess the movie. Good idea, and I did way better than I had any right to do, not being that much of a movie guy. I got 18/24, and the ones I didn't get I'd by and large never even heard of.

The GoToQuiz Political Spectrum Quiz in Full: Part Four

Finally, the fourth and last installment: what I believe, in a very large nutshell. Or: say it loud, I'm lefty and I'm proud.

40. Gay equality is a sign of progress. Agree strongly: Absolutely. As much as anything else out there, really.

41. The state should be able to put a criminal to death if the crime was serious enough. Disagree strongly: Nope. No exceptions. Capital punishment is never acceptable.

42. The military budget should be scaled back. Agree strongly: Both in the out-of-control USA, for whom I imagine this quiz was designed, and up here too, where military spending has been on the rise as other things are being slashed.

43. Economic competition results in inumerable innovations that improve all of our lives. Agree: It also results in many horrid things that hurt us all. But I won't deny that competition has enabled progress in certain ways that might not have occurred without it.

44. It is not our place to condemn other cultures as backwards or barbaric. Agree: Phenomenally loaded question. I am up for criticising other cultures - or perhaps to put it better criticising other societies. I think you can establish benchmarks and then according to them 'rate' the countries of the world. But obviously 'barbaric' is not a useful word. And neither is 'condemn'.

45. When one group is slaughtering another group somewhere in the world, we have a responsibility to intervene. Agree: I do agree. Death matters, whoever it's happening to, wherever in the world. I haven't looked up 'intervene' in the dictionary to see if it refers solely to military measures. But I tend to think that the word can apply to things other than guns a-blazin'.

46. We'd be better off if we could just lock up some of the people expressing radical political views, and keep them away from society. Disagree strongly: This is just patently ridiculous.

47. Unrestrained capitalism cannot last, as wealth and power will concentrate to a small elite. Agree strongly: I think this is currently happening, to a rather shocking degree. The fact that some of the world's richest have a philantropical bent doesn't really change all that much - at the moment, worldwide the gap is increasing at a shocking rate, and sooner or later it has to give.

48. It is a problem when young people display a lack of respect for authority. Disagree: Not really. Perhaps I'm not yet old enough to get upset about that.

49. When corporate interests become too powerful, the state should take action to ensure the public interest is served. Agree strongly: What else is the state for?

50. A person's morality is of the most personal nature; therefore government should have no involvement in moral questions or promote moral behaviors. Neutral: I'm not neutral about this at all, but I'm undecided. I think that a government has a very real role in promoting tolerance, for example. They should be doing whatever they can to change bigots' minds - shy, of course, of active coersion. I suspect that this question is designed to make people think of the opposite - of 'legislating morality' by, for example, criminalising homosexuality. While that's reprehensible, I don't think I can quite make the blanket statement that the questions wants me to, though.

51. The state should not set a minimum wage. Disagree strongly: I'm shocked that this actually exists as a cause for advocacy. Or rather I'm not actually as shocked by it as I wish I were, but there's really no argument for repealing minimum wage legislation beyond 'we can work them as slaves and no one can stop us!' Not to sound even more old-school lefty than I genuinely am, but I have a sad and uncomfortable feeling that workers' rights are being seriously trampled on, to a degree unseen for a century perhaps, at the present moment, and no one really seems to give a damn about it. It really saddens me.

52. A nation's retirement safety net cannot be trusted to the fluctuations of the stock market. Agree: Well, it's tough to argue with this, one would think. 'Sorry grandpa, but it's Ramen noodles for you this month; RIM underperformed.' But the world never fails to surprise me.

53. Offensive or blasphemous art should be suppressed.: Disagree strongly: Only if 'suppressed' means 'encouraged'.

The GoToQuiz Political Spectrum Quiz in Full: Part Three

And here's part three. Once you get me started, I never shut up.

27. People with a criminal history should not be able to vote. Disagree: Seems there are people out there all too willing to take away other people's right to vote. Either voting is something that every adult citizen can do or your country is not a democracy. Besides, where do you draw the line? A lot of people are arrested for minor infractions, or for laws that are later overturned. If a governmnet has introduced an unjust law, shouldn't people be allowed to penalise that governmnet by voting them out of office? WHat if that government just arrested all its opponents?

28. Marijuana should be legal. Agree: A lot of people get really passionate about this. I find that I don't. On the question itself, I am pro-legalisation, but I don't really worry that much about it at all.

29. The state should fine television stations for broadcasting offensive language. Disagree strongly: I could care less about so-called 'four letter words', if that's what this refers to. If it's about hate speech, that's different.

30. It does not make sense to understand the motivations of terrorists because they are self-evidently evil. Disagree strongly: Denying yourself a valuable tool in dealing with terrorists just seems almost comically counterproductive. Plus, terrorist actions are evil, but on the level of 'justification' you can often find hard truths worth confronting.

31. The lower the taxes, the better off we all are. Disagree strongly: There are no limits to the good we can do if we all work together, through the agency of the government.

32. Minority groups that have faced discrimination should receive help from the state to get on an equal footing. Agree: This seems like an obvious one to me. It's merely a question of righting historic wrongs. No point in saying, 'get over it', if the previous discrimination has been so thorough that it's left people severely disadvantages. See, for example, on-reservation Native Canadians.

33. It is wrong to question a leader in wartime. Disagree strongly: Ridiculous. Sometimes I wonder about the mindsets of some people, like who would even entertain agreeing with this.

34. Tighter regulation would have prevented the collapse of the lending industry. Neutral: I don't really know enough to say either way. My gut tells me probably 'yes', but I don't actually know, so on the fence I remain.

35. It makes sense and is fair that some people make much more money than others. Disagree strongly: To a certain extent, I realise I probably have to come to terms with accepting that economic imbalance is perhaps to a certain degree inevitable. But to call it fair is no more than a malicious distortion of the word 'fair'.

36. Toppling enemy regimes to spread democracy will make the world a safer place. Agree: Probably the biggest dilemma for me. I do believe that the people of the world have a right to good governance, and that an African grappling with corrupt government is no less of a tragedy than a European doing the same. And I don't fall for the trap of moral relativism, the 'who's to say democracy is any better?' cop-out. I do believe that right is right, and that tyranny is wrong. But the idea of interventionism makes me uncomfortable, and I retain a knee-jerk opposition to war. I also think 'enemy' is a stupid word here, and that we have a horrible habit in the west of using tactics so heavy-handed that any sense of 'liberation' is lost and the end result is more destructive than allowing the tyrant to remain. Still, though... I wish people didn't have to deal with megalomaniacs, and since this is a question about our opinions, there's my answer. Equivocal though it may be.

37. The state has no business regulating alcohol and tobacco products. Disagree strongly: Does anyone really believe that?

38. If an unwed teen becomes pregnant, abortion may be a responsible choice. Agree strongly: This is a loaded question, taking the issue from choice to merely choosing. But being pro-choice means acknowledging that abortion is a legitimate choice for some women, and if you're pro-choice but somehow uncomfortable about the actual reality of abortions, then you have a dichotomy that needs resolving.

39. International trade agreements should require environmental protections and workers' rights. (meaning: no free trade with countries that lack pollution controls or labor protections) Agree: This is not exactly easy. I think that the anti-globalisation tendencies that exist on the left, sometimes not far from protectionism really, are based on the notion that such caveats are impossible to get or maintain, and as such shouldn't even be bothered with. Realistically, there's probably a reason why our trade treaties are so excessively laissez-faire. But the idea of tied trade, where the tie is noble in intent, is a good one. And again fears of 'interventionism' can be cast aside in favour of 'improving the lot in life of people abroad' - which has to be a noble goal, however troublesome the process of attaining it might be.

The GoToQuiz Political Spectrum Quiz in Full: Part Two

Here's part two. Check out part one for details, which I can't be bothered to write out in full a second time.

14. If our leader meets with our enemies, it makes us appear weak. Disagree strongly: How could someone confuse intransigence with strength?

15. We must use our military from time to time to protect our supply of oil, to avoid a national crisis.: Disagree strongly: Brazenly using the word 'oil' almost makes this look like a joke. But I know some people still said they agreed.

16. Strong gun ownership rights protect the people against tyranny. Disagree strongly: Absolute nonsense. Strong gun ownership laws protect the people against gun crime. It's a proven fact.

17. It makes no sense to say 'I'm spiritual but not religious.' Disagree strongly: It makes no sense to say what makes sense and what doesn't about another person's view on matters spiritual.

18. It is not government's responsibility to regulate pollution. Disagree strongly: Who else is going to do it?

19. Gay marriage should be forbidden. Disagree strongly: In addition to health care, the other thing I feel most strongly about. That we're still talking fundamental civil rights in 2011 is mind-boggling.

20. It should be against the law to use hateful language toward another racial group. Agree: I do believe this, though according to American logic it makes me 'authoritarian'. But America is the land where an irrational dedication to individual rights is allowed to override any sense whatsoever of civic responsibility. It's also the land where people will defend the Westboro Baptist Church's right to spout their garbage wherever they want. Not me, sir.

21. Government should ensure that all citizens meet a certain minimum standard of living. Agree strongly: I can't see why we even have a government if we don't think this is what a government ought to be doing.

22. It is wrong to enforce moral behavior through the law because this infringes upon an individual's freedom. Agree: I think there's a matter to be discussed regarding moral behaviour and their effects upon others. I think that gay marriage and marijuana use are qjuite different from gun ownership and hate speech. I'll go to the wire to defend freedoms that don't inringe on others' freedoms. But I don't really have any tolerance for people who will use a sense of 'freedom' to break down the bonds we have in society to one another.

23. Immigration restrictions are economically protectionist. Non-citizens should be allowed to sell their labor domestically at a rate the market will pay. Disagree: Not strongly, though. I think we do have some horribly protectionist immigration laws.

24. An official language should be set, and immigrants should have to learn it. Disagree: I almost agree with this one, actually. I think having a set national language - or languages - is only a logical thing to do. I have no problem with some kind of linguistic requirement for 'economic immigrants' - I don't think it's especially necessary, since an economic immigrant will de facto have to learn the language, but making it a requirement is fine by me. What makes me say 'disagree' though is the fact of relatives: I think an immigrant from, say, Vietnam should be able to bring his parents over. Requiring those people, who may be senior citizens, to grapple with English or French seems pretty pointless to me.

25. Whatever maximizes economic growth is good for the people. Disagree: Again, it's the absolute way in which the question is worded. I'm not entirely against free-market economics; I think they merely need to be grounded in a respect for humanity. Which is why I put 'disagree' - there are plenty of ways to maximise economic growth that ultimately hurt individuals, society or the environment. Whenever that happens, economic growth matters less than rectifying the problem.

26. Racial issues will never be resolved. It is human nature to prefer one's own race. Disagree strongly: Ridiculous. There are millions of people who are living proof of the falsehood of this statement.

The GoToQuiz Political Spectrum Quiz in Full: Part One

So, briefly - I found a site that hosts one of the many quizzes out there that purports to place you on a political spectrum. I've already forgotten where it put me except that it called me 'classically left-wing' (I think), and more centrist on libertarian/authoritarian than I tend to be. Anyway, what I thought I'd do is expand on my answers to each of the 53 questions it asks, providing a bit further discussion. And I'll present them over four parts. So here's part one, the first thirteen questions it asks (verbatim), my answer (from 'Agree strongly' to 'Agree' to 'Neutral' to 'Disagree' to 'Disagree strongly') and a bit of explanation. It also asked you to rank the importance of the issue. I did, but I don't care enough to include that here.

1. Laws should restrict abortion in all or most cases. Disagree strongly: I'm very strongly pro-choice and have nothing really else to add to this. I'm even offended by the idea that a father should have some say in the decision.

2. Unions were indispensible in establishing the middle class. Agree strongly: We owe so much to the unions that it's a crying shame they've been demonised so successfully down the years. I think they'll probably be crushed, more or less, within the next generation.

3. In nearly every instance, the free market allocates resources most efficiently. Disagree: I didn't put 'strongly' because I can concede that at times the free market can do this and certainly that inefficiently run state monopolies in practice frequently don't. But the simple fact remains that when a company's goal is funneling profits to the top in as large a volume as possible, it's quite impossible for the allocation of funds to be described as 'most efficient'.

4. Public radio and television funded by the state provide a valuable service the citizens. Agree strongly: I think this is a great example of where the public and private sectors can 'compete' by not quite stepping on each others' toes. Let the for-profit channels show Simon Cowell programmes, but retain a broadcasting service whose primary goal is something loftier than kowtowing to Kraft and General Motors.

5. Some people should not be allowed to reproduce. Disagree strongly: Eugenics rubbish. I wonder how many people say yes to this.

6. Access to healthcare is a right. Agree strongly: There are few things I'm more passionate about. The idea that society can be comfortable with some citizens not having access to health care boggles my mind.

7. The rich should pay a higher tax rate than the middle class. Agree strongly: I think this is self-evident, really. 20% is much more of a burden for a wage-earner than it is for Mark Zuckerburg. From each according to his abilities to each according to his needs, right?

8. School science classes should teach intelligent design. Disagree strongly: Science classes should teach science. Not rubbish.

9. Marriage must be heralded for the important role it plays in society. Neutral: I don't really even understand this question. What does 'heralded' mean in this context, exactly?

10. Sometimes war is necessary, even if it means you strike first. Disagree: War is one of the main issues I'm most torn on. I fundamentally believe war is wrong and needs to be avoided. But one thing I think I share with people whose views I'm otherwise diametrically opposed to is a sense that right and wrong are not relative - that 'evil' (though I connsider that a meaninglessly loaded word) exists and needs to be prevented. So in practice, while I'm highly uncomfortable with us being at war in Libya, I think walking away and allowing Gadhafi to continue to terrorise his people would also be unconscionable. I think that ultimately what I'm starting to believe is that in lieu of other options, preventative war might be a necessity. But (a) those other options need to be considered as thoroughly as possible, and (b) don't expect me to be holding a gun, whatever the situation.

11. Patriotism is an overrated quality. Agree strongly: I have not a single good thing to say for patriotism. Last refuge of the scoundrel indeed.

12. Radio stations should be required to present balanced news coverage. Agree: I can't say I'm passionate about it enough to put the 'strongly' in there. But we were up against a similar situation in Canada recently, where apropos of nothing the law we currently have was going to be changed to, in effect, allow news sources to lie... er, stretch the truth. Now I think that so far in Canada we've been able to avoid the complete descent into propaganda that has happened in the USA largely because we have stronger laws. But I'm not against a news source having a viewpoint. I merely think they need to report the news factually, and make a clear distinction between when reporting stops and editorialising begins.

13. Government should do something about the increasing violence in video games. Disagree: I could care less about violent video games. It's such a non-issue.

The Textify Quiz

I'm not sure how I wound up sitting on this entry for a month... I discovered Textify, a site that takes pictures and makes them look as if they are made up of letters. Pointillism with letters, if you will. A bizarre idea, and quite useless, but there you have it. I decided to turn it into a quiz, taking pictures of ten celebrities (and I use the word 'celebrity' in its broadest possible meaning - these people range from 'currently on the list of most-Googled' to 'I haven't thought of that person in a decade') and 'textifying' them - that is to say obscuring the original pictures by converting them to text-based pictures. In order to keep it interesting, I exploited Textify's various options to give each of them a slightly different appearance.

Oh... and in each case the letters used in the, er, 'textification' spell out a word or an acronym pertinent to the 'celebrity' in question. This is arguably a clue, or alternately the opposite: guessing the celebrity might lead you to guess what the letters spell and what their significance is.

» Answer to Textify #1 - click here «

Number one is Kim Kardashian. The letters spell "DASH", which is a shop she owns or something that I don't care about enough to Google.

» Answer to Textify #2 - click here «

Number two is Angela Merkel. The letters spell "DE", which is the country code for Germany.

» Answer to Textify #3 - click here «

Number three is Bill Murray. The letters spell "SNL", the acronym for Saturday Night Live, the show he started on.

» Answer to Textify #4 - click here «

Number four is Princess Beatrice. The letters spell "FASCINATOR", the technical name for the strange thing she wore on her head at her cousin's recent wedding.

» Answer to Textify #5 - click here «

Number five is Al Sharpton. The letters spell "REV", which is of course short for "Reverend", a title he holds.

» Answer to Textify #6 - click here «

Number six is Janelle Monáe. The letters spell "ARCH", which is part of the name of her main album to date, The ArchAndroid (this is the most obscure of the ten, I think).

» Answer to Textify #7 - click here «

Number seven is Tammy Faye Bakker. The letters spell "PTL", the acronym (meaning 'Praise the Lord') that she and her husband Jimmy used to defraud the gullible in the 1980s.

» Answer to Textify #8 - click here «

Number eight is Vince Shamwow. The letters spell "SLAP", the first half of the name of Vince Shamwow's other claim to fame (I'm aware that 'Shamwow' isn't actually his surname, by the way).

» Answer to Textify #9 - click here «

Number nine is Dom DeLuise. The letters spell "CHEF", which meant something a few weeks ago when I made the picture, but I can't care enough about Dom DeLuise to go remind myself what that was.

» Answer to Textify #10 - click here «

Number ten is Richard Nixon. The letters spell "TRICKY", as in 'Tricky Dick', something the man was often called in the 1970s.

Ol kantri - a quiz

So according to the Tok Pisin Wikipedia, the following are country names in the Tok Pisin language - the Tok Pisin language is an English-based creole, and as such you can pick out the meanings of a good many words just by looking at them and thinking about them. So all of the following are countries in the world - what are their names translated into 'standard' English?

1. Ostrelia
2. Posugol
3. Suwidan
4. Niu Silan
5. Ol Yunaitet Stet
6. Ijip
7. Aialan
8. Pranis
9. Siamani
10. Siapan

The answers appear below. Click to see them.

» Answers! «

1. Ostrelia - Australia. Nothing tough there.
2. Posugol - Portugal. Also not tough - note the silent 'r', and how a 'ch' sound becomes an 's' sound.
3. Suwidan - Sweden. No real pronunciation change, just different orthography.
4. Niu Silan - New Zealand. A 'z' becomes an 's' too.
5. Ol Yunaitet Stet - The United States. 'Ol' shows a plural form.
6. Ijip - Egypt. The very different spelling is deceptive. How does this one get a 'j' though?
7. Aialan - Ireland. Again, it's the orthography that confuses.
8. Pranis - France. Very tough - like in Korean, an 'f' becomes a 'p'. Easy after that.
9. Siamani - Germany. That 'si' represents the 'j' sound.
10. Siapan - Japan. The answer to the previous one makes this one easier.

Lost in Google Translation, Volume Two

This is an old game I used to play back in the days of BabelFish: testing its automated language translation services by putting a bit of text through a variety of languages and looking at the end result, which had invariably been chewed up beyond recognition. The results often had a mysterious poetry to them, in fact, but were clearly nonsense.

Google's translation service is, I must admit, light years ahead. So much so, in fact, that a single test of translating text from English into Language X and then back again would result in text 95% identical to the original. So no good, then. Instead, I subject texts to a translation through five languages before reconverting it to English. The results are, well, much more abstract.

Each selection here is a verse from a popular song (with slight modifications to grammar and punctuation to make complete sentences) translated through five different languages before being reconverted to English. Your job is merely to look at the results and see if you can't guess which song you're currently viewing, lost in Google Translation.

The answers to each are contained immediately below them, hidden behind a spoiler tag. Click to reveal.

#2 I like the wind through the trees. Sampingku night was so. months, but the sun stayed uniongoze. He accepted my idea, but I did not know what to do. Right next to the body wajahku I felt rambling. I am not in his eyes: in my group. Only a fool believes he can do what they need to hear. I like the wind.

» #1 - Click for the answer. «

"She's Like the Wind" by Patrick Swayze.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&page=1&keyid=1325904&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

She's like the wind through my tree. She rides the night next to me. She leads me through moonlight only to burn me with the sun. She's taken my heart, but she doesn't know what she's done. I feel her breath on my face, her body close to me. I can't look in her eyes: she's out of my league. Just a fool to believe I have anything she needs. She's like the wind.

#2 Today is your day going. Now, in some ways, you must understand you can do. I do not believe that he does feel for the moment. Word Street is the heart of the high fever is back. I have never heard before, but never doubt I am going to die. I do not believe that he does feel for the moment. The closure, all the lights are published menyilaukan. I want to say much, but I do not know how.

» #2 - Click for the answer. «

"Wonderwall" by Oasis.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=2086865&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

Today is gonna be the day that they're going to throw it back to you. By now you should have somehow realized what you've got to do. I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now. Backbeat, the word was on the street that the fire in your heart is out. I'm sure you've heard it all before, but you never really had a doubt. I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now. And all the roads we walk along are winding, and all the lights that lead us there are blinding. There are many things that I would like to say to you, but I don't know how.

#2 Me and false. My mother, father, you should come. I attack the world. I am rolling shakes bad for you. Liam. Pink monkey bird And I tell you an indication of the brain breakdown. See for yourself. Ray put gun to my head. Press your space face close to me, I love you. dream mud Wed, oh yeah, and escape.

» #3 - Click for the answer. «

"Moonage Daydream" by David Bowie.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1007962&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

I'm an alligator. I'm a mama-papa coming for you. I'm a space invader. I'll be a rocking rolling bitch for you. Keep your mouth shut. You're squawking like a pink monkey bird, and I'm busting up my brains for the words. Keep your electric eye on me babe. Put your ray gun to my head. Press your space face close to mine, love. Freak out in a moonage daydream, oh yeah.

#3 Last good. When your hands up. Click on get their own way in life. The day will come. their lives, why people like How to choose? Last good. Last good. ends. Last good. That our time is one hour. Now is the time here. Waiting for my life, my life forever. Yellow is the color of the sun. I have to hide. Always, often in my life, my life here. Yellow is the color of the sun.

» #4 - Click for the answer. «

"Keep On Movin'" by Soul II Soul.

http://www.ascap.com/ace/search.cfm?requesttimeout=300&mode=results&searchstr=410098934&search_in=i&search_type=exact&search_det=t,s,w,p,b,v&results_pp=30&start=1

Keep on moving. Don't stop like the hands of time. Click clock, find your own way to stay. The time will come one day. Why do people choose to live their lives this way? Keep on moving. Keep on moving. Don't stop, no. Keep on moving. It's our time, time today. The right time is here to stay. Stay in my life, my life always. Yellow is the colour of sunrays. I hide myself from no one. I know the time will surely come when you'll be in my life, my life always. Yellow is the colour of sunrays.

#5 I think the future of our children. The best way to learn. beauty all to themselves. Providing tools for pride. Many laughed when my children need reminding. Both are looking for heroes. We need people to see. need to do: I had the opportunity to meet and quiet, so I learned to my faith.

» #5 - Click for the answer. «

"The Greatest Love of All" by Whitney Houston.

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I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they possess inside. Give them a sense of pride to make it easier. Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be. Everybody's searching for a hero. People need someone to look up to. I never found anyone who fulfill my needs: a lonely place to be, so I learned to depend on me.

#6 We say about that. Me, Not me, another day of driving themselves, I'm getting ready to do so. I love the same? Al, get me I will continue a day or two. So, my little things go without saying, but it seems like life is slowly leaving teaching. Say: nothing is more important than to be. Al, get me I will continue a day or two.

» #6 - Click for the answer. «

"Take on Me" by a-ha.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1451670&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

We're talking away. I don't know what I'm to say; I'll say it anyway: today's another day to find you shying away. I'll be coming for your love, OK? Take on me, take me on. I'll be gone in a day or two. So, needless to say I'm odds and ends, but that's me stumbling away, slowly learning that life is OK. Say after me: It's no better to be safe than sorry. Take on me, take me on. I'll be gone in a day or two.

#7 Oh, my friends are regular remove dirt and Liege, but my dad his "can not bother me to give them. World will not end. He for me a man who Talcs as foot foot, people like my son. Amount of care. Or hand of a man my son. ".

» #7 - Click for the answer. «

"Walk Like a Man" by the Four Seasons.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1599245&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

Oh, how you tried to cut me down to size, telling dirty lies to my friends, but my own father said "Give her up, don't bother. The world isn't coming to an end". He told me, walk like a man, talk like a man, walk like a man my son. No woman's worth crawling on the earth, so walk like a man, my son."

#8 All the old graves of a file from the sand dance do not you? If they fast, they fell like dominoes for you. 'M Nile marketing and all those invested. Golden crocodiles C their simple mud. Variety of hookah pipe "that really inanikumbusha, Oh yeah. This, indeed, reminds us." Egypt, such as foot.

» #8 - Click for the answer. «

"Walk Like an Egyptian" by the Bangles.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1599261&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

All the old paintings on the tombs, they do the sand dance, don't you know? If they move too quick, they're falling down like a domino. All the bazaar men by the Nile, they got the money on a bet. Gold crocodiles, they snap their teeth on your cigarette. Foreign types with the hookah pipes say, 'Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh.' Walk like an Egyptian.

#9 If you still hear my joy, but I think you all are my conscience, I guess. If I'm Walking shoes and when my friends for your entertainment and Flowers suggest that wind is concerned, I feel I can not. What is a fright. I do not bother me at all. 51, captain of irregular solitaria Tobacco Research Community and play until dawn. Now, I can do nothing for you.

» #9 - Click for the answer. «

"Flowers on the Wall" by the Statler Brothers.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=426550&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

I keep hearing you're concerned about my happiness, but all that thought you're giving me is conscience, I guess. If I were walking in your shoes, I wouldn't worry none while you and your friends are worrying about me, I'm having lots of fun counting flowers on the wall. That doesn't bother me at all. Playing solitare till dawn with a deck of fifty one, smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo. Now don't tell me I've nothing to do.

#10 Sometimes it is established all love a man with a good and sad and it is not difficult to know a good time to do, but if you love him and forgive him even harbor to understand. If you love it. Geugahaneun he was 12 years more recently proud. It is a cold lonely night to wait for a hot and is only two officers. Husband Tribune and the world would you know that you love it. You can all love. Arising from your man.

» #10 - Click for the answer. «

"Stand By Your Man" by Tammy Wynette.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1401033&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

Sometimes its hard to be a woman giving all your love to just one man: you'll have bad times, and he'll have good times doing things that you don't understand, but if you love him you'll forgive him, even though he's hard to understand. And if you love him, be proud of him, because after all he's just a man. Stand by your man, give him two arms to cling to and something warm to come to when nights are cold and lonely. Stand by your man and tell the world you love him. Keep giving all the love you can. Stand by your man.

Lost in Google Translation, Volume One

This is an old game I used to play back in the days of BabelFish: testing its automated language translation services by putting a bit of text through a variety of languages and looking at the end result, which had invariably been chewed up beyond recognition. The results often had a mysterious poetry to them, in fact, but were clearly nonsense.

Google's translation service is, I must admit, light years ahead. So much so, in fact, that a single test of translating text from English into Language X and then back again would result in text 95% identical to the original. So no good, then. Instead, I subject texts to a translation through five languages before reconverting it to English. The results are, well, much more abstract.

Each selection here is a verse from a popular song (with slight modifications to grammar and punctuation to make complete sentences) translated through five different languages before being reconverted to English. Your job is merely to look at the results and see if you can't guess which song you're currently viewing, lost in Google Translation.

The answers to each are contained immediately below them, hidden behind a spoiler tag. Click to reveal.

#1 I usually can not find. Frightened lying around and I do not understand. Now ladies sitting at her desk nearby. Closed Curtain Hall Kass from people like me think this Oh, I do not die in the hands gedoeeotseupnida you say that I died in my hands Oh Death at hand. I had some clear kiss I had.

» #1 - Click for the answer. «

"(I Just) Died in Your Arms Tonight" by Cutting Crew.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=629853&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

I keep looking for something I can't get. Broken hearts lie all around me, and I don't see an easy way to get out of this. Her diary, it sits on the bedside table. The curtains are closed. The cat's in the cradle. Who would've thought that a boy like me could come to this? Oh I, I just died in your arms tonight. It must've been something you said. I just died in your arms tonight. Oh I, I just died in your arms tonight. It must've been some kind of kiss. I should have walked away. I should've walked away.

#2 I do not like you I wonder if it bad, you can if you have good people do not know. His life and soul together, not just be Cold war, tired, but I know every nerve fibers difficult heart Broken, frozen my life. I do not want this anymore. It is better shoes, even one day be broken or not. If we want to do better? It would be better for me more often, green is very cool, if we are not helpless or not.

» #2 - Click for the answer. «

"Wouldn't It be Good?" by Nik Kershaw.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1696551&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

I got it bad. You don't know how bad I got it. You got it easy. You don't know when you got it good. It's getting harder just keeping life and soul together. I'm sick of fighting, even though I know I should. The cold is biting through each and every nerve and fibre. My broken spirit is frozen to the core. I don't wanna be here anymore. Wouldn't it be good to be in your shoes, even if it was for just one day? Wouldn't it be good if we could wish ourselves away? Wouldn't it be good to be on your side? The grass is always greener over there. Wouldn't it be good if we could live without a care?

#3 It was morning. The sun is up to the last. Last night was shaking quite large. After teaching my cat scratch my skin, otherwise the error? Hungry children will tell him about his service and good food. Add to a new place. I went here when I can: If you want to make me the storm here: If you want to make the storm.

» #3 - Click for the answer. «

"Rock You Like a Hurricane" by the Scorpions.

http://www.ascap.com/ace/search.cfm?requesttimeout=300&mode=results&searchstr=480180463&search_in=i&search_type=exact&search_det=t,s,w,p,b,v&results_pp=30&start=1

It's early morning. The sun comes out. Last night was shaking and pretty loud. My cat is purring and scratches my skin, so what is wrong with another sin? The bitch is hungry. She needs to tell, so give her inches and feed her well. More days to come, new places to go. I've got to leave: it's time for a show. Here I am: rock you like a hurricane. Here I am: rock you like a hurricane.

#4 So, how kabarmu I walked, I saw men and women. This is not the time to talk. Music and hot women, where they were born and began to start properly. However, just look the other way. New York Times' to trying to understand the impact on our people. If the mother and family, you live. We live in a city miles we all feel broken, I want to live life.

» #4 - Click for the answer. «

"Stayin' Alive" by the Bee Gees.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=1406855&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk, I'm a woman's man. No time to talk. Music loud and women warm, I've been kicked around since I was born, and now it's all right. It's okay, and you may look the other way. We can try to understand the New York Times' effect on man. Whether you're a brother or whether you're a mother, you're staying alive, staying alive. Feel the city breaking and everybody shaking, and we're stayin' alive, stayin' alive.

#5 New Orleans east, they want the sun, and many poor children in the home, this is the balance. And God, I know. It is normal that new sewing blue jeans. My dad, gambling man Down in New Orleans said. Now only the players and the bag and luggage only won when he saw the required 20,000.

» #5 - Click for the answer. «

"House of the Rising Sun" as performed by the Animals.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&page=1&keyid=589048&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

There is a house in New Orleans they call the Rising Sun, and it's been the ruin of many a poor boy. And, God, I know I'm one. My mother was a tailor; she sewed my new blue jeans. My father was a gambling man down in New Orleans. Now the only thing a gambler needs is a suitcase and trunk, and the only time he's satisfied is when he's all drunk.

#6 Now I had seen what I saw off Queen Knight drum drum and sing and bow tree farm is excluded. Announce the day and swim Mother Nature Watch 19-70 air travel to travel to visit 70 Mother Nature I was burning in the basement of the full moon in my eyes I burst through the sky Sunday, I hope to replace. Band playing in my head feel better. I think my friends that I hope will My friends think he wants his own address.

» #6 - Click for the answer. «

"After the Goldrush" by Neil Young.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=10423&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

Well, I dreamed I saw the knights in armour coming, saying something about a queen. There were peasants singing and drummers drumming, and the archer split the tree. There was a fanfare blowing to the sun that was floating on the breeze. Look at Mother Nature on the run in the nineteen-seventies. Look at Mother Nature on the run in the nineteen seventies. I was lying in a burned-out basement with the full moon in my eyes. I was hoping for replacement when the sun burst through the sky. There was a band playing in my head, and I felt like getting high. I was thinking about what a friend had said: I was hoping it was a lie. Thinking about what a friend had said, I was hoping it was a lie.

#7 Please call to revive: I fear the weakness of the Year and lively shaking colleagues here monsŵn to tears listening to the bass boom: US, unbearably big break Store: a and called the police to your But did not dare stare, you can go for you. I compared the remaining pieces dice. Competitive pay, you win / I'm right and you knock your mother.

» #7 - Click for the answer. «

"Mama Said Knock You Out" by LL Cool J.

http://www.ascap.com/ace/search.cfm?requesttimeout=300&mode=results&searchstr=430434103&search_in=i&search_type=exact&search_det=t,s,w,p,b,v&results_pp=30&start=1

Don't call it a comeback: I've been here for years rocking my peers and putting suckers in fear, making the tears rain down like a monsoon. Listen to the bass go boom: explosion, overpowering. Over the competition I'm towering. Wrecking shop: when I drop these lyrics that'll make you call the cops, don't you dare stare; you'd better move. Don't ever compare me to the rest: that'll all get sliced and diced. Competition's paying the price. I'm going to knock you out. Mama said knock you out.

#8 I think I'm ready for you. I think I'm ready for you. I think I'm ready for you. I am, but more money, no comment on the money. This is more than money, they want to build. At the time, it will be worth many times more. oh, so ayolah, patience and time to do it correctly, you need to do, and they are.

» #8 - Click for the answer. «

"Got My Mind Set on You" by George Harrison.

http://repertoire.bmi.com/title.asp?blnWriter=True&blnPublisher=True&blnArtist=True&keyid=684540&ShowNbr=0&ShowSeqNbr=0&querytype=WorkID

I got my mind set on you. I got my mind set on you. I got my mind set on you. I got my mind set on you, but it's going to take money, a whole lot of spending money. It's going to take plenty of money to do it right, child. It's going to take time, a whole lot of precious time. Its gonna take patience and time to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it, to do it right, child.

#9 He worked in a restaurant. My daughter just overlooked. I never saw him only end mezzanine Small-town father is not always the root of his movement continued. One of the desert road riding Harley Davidson - flying wind her long hair to yellow. He fled chrome steel air atmosfääriõhku driver hit 2.1.

» #9 - Click for the answer. «

"Unknown Legend" by Neil Young.

http://www.ascap.com/ace/search.cfm?requesttimeout=300&mode=results&searchstr=510091902&search_in=i&search_type=exact&search_det=t,s,w,p,b,v&results_pp=30&start=1

She used to work in a diner. I never saw a woman look finer. I used to order just to watch her float across the floor. She grew up in a small town, never put her roots down: daddy always kept moving, so she did too. Somewhere on a desert highway, she rides a Harley-Davidson; her long blonde hair flying in the wind. She's been running half her life, the chrome and steel she rides colliding with the very air she breathes, the air she breathes.

#10 Just woke up on Thanksgiving morning. I do not know this seems odd: no smoke from cooking breakfast mother dog Pars no wheelbarrow I'm not digging mines and pigs. Finally I would like to dig, buy a low to let me hold the door when he pressured another 24 I think you need to change "I will be changing my me to ass my glass of me and see all Jacker is on fire the red Kim that his voice, he asked all my homies back care, I hope everyone can "I played basketball in my garden" Me. In court my problem: to finish second and third last week. MJ niggas do not deviate so all the good that day.

» #10 - Click for the answer. «

"It Was a Good Day" by Ice Cube.

http://www.ascap.com/ace/search.cfm?requesttimeout=300&mode=results&searchstr=390512515&search_in=i&search_type=exact&search_det=t,s,w,p,b,v&results_pp=30&start=1

Just waking up in the morning, I've got to thank God. I don't know, but today seems kind of odd: no barking from the dogs, no smog, and mama cooked a breakfast with no hog. I've got my grub on, but didn't pig out. I finally got a call from a girl I want to dig out. Hooked it up on later as I hit the door, thinking, "Will I live another twenty-four?" I've got to go because I got me a drop top, and if I hit the switch, I can make the ass drop. Had to stop at a red light, looking in my mirror, not a jacker in sight, and everything is all right. I got a beep from Kim, and she can fuck all night. I called up the homies and I'm asking you all, "which park are you all playin basketball?" Get me on the court and I'm trouble: last week, I fucked around and got a triple double. Freaking niggas everyway like M.J. I can't believe, today was a good day.

Morphing by Name: A Quiz

This quiz serves two purposes: one is to allow myself to play further with the MorphThing website, and two is to allow myself to play with spoiler tags, which I learnt about here, and which I hope to use from now on for quizes.

In this particular case, it works like this: I've morphed together photographs of two famous people who share the same given name. In other words, I could perhaps morph a picture of Michelle Obama together with one of Michelle Rodriguez. Knowing only that, look at the resulting morphed picture and try to guess who the people are. Below each picture are two spoilers. The first is a 'clue' spoiler, and if you click on it, it'll tell you the shared first name of the two people in the morph. If you click on the second one, it will tell you the answer, including with thumbnails of the two people. Let's see how it goes...

» Morph #1 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Martin".

» Morph #1 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Martin Gore and Martin Lawrence.

» Morph #2 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Steve".

» Morph #2 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Steve Buscemi and Steve Carell.

» Morph #3 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Emma".

» Morph #3 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Emma Bunton and Emma Watson.

» Morph #4 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Jamie".

» Morph #4 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Jamie Hyneman and Jamie Oliver.

» Morph #5 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Bruce".

» Morph #5 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Bruce Lee and Bruce Springsteen.

» Morph #6 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Susan".

» Morph #6 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Susan B. Anthony and Susan Boyle.

» Morph #7 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Tony".

» Morph #7 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Tony Blair and Tony Danza.

» Morph #8 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Mike".

» Morph #8 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Mike Huckabee and Mike Tyson.

» Morph #9 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Sarah".

» Morph #9 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Sarah Michelle Gellar and Sarah Palin.

» Morph #10 - Click for a clue. «

Both people are named "Robert".

» Morph #10 - Click for the answer. «

The morph is of Robert Downey, Jr. and Robert Mugabe.