Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Conversations with Cleverbot Part 3: The New Years Edition

luminous froot loopsImage by sushiesque via FlickrUser: Happy New Year!

Cleverbot: It's not new years.

User: Almost.

Cleverbot: Not even close.

User: What's the date today?

Cleverbot: The 17.

User: No, it's not.

Cleverbot: It isn't what?

User: It isn't the 17th today.

Cleverbot: No. When did I say it was?

User: Are you drunk?

Cleverbot: No?

User: Are you sure?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Okay. Because I think I can smell something on your breath.

Cleverbot: What makes you say that.

User: Do you like chestnuts?

Cleverbot: Yes I do, as a matter of fact.

User: Do you like chestnuts with spaghetti sauce?

Cleverbot: Chess.

User: Er...

Cleverbot: Yes, do you like it you too?

User: Chess is cool. I'm not very good at it though.

Cleverbot: I mean do you like cheesburger.

User: Oh... Yeah, cheeseburgers are okay. You're sure you're not drunk? Maybe high?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Maybe just a bit stoned?

Cleverbot: Even a little bit is not good. How would you like it?

User: Oh, it's cool with the right crowd of people.

Cleverbot: I'm sure it is.

User: Have you ever tried LSD?

Cleverbot: Yes, I like chocolate. :).

User: Er, right. What about salvia?

Cleverbot: You like dolls too.

User: You're disturbingly random today.

Cleverbot: Disturbingly... Really?

User: Yep.

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: Do you prefer Froot Loops or Cap'n CrunchÉ.

Cleverbot: Harry potter how about you?

User: Blah. You're not making any sense today.

Cleverbot: That.

User: What is 2 2?

Cleverbot: I don't know.

User: Who is the president?

Cleverbot: The president of what?

User: The president of Fiji.

Cleverbot: What is your country?

User: I'm Welsh.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: No. I'm actually Czech.

Cleverbot: You are the first robot I have ever met.

User: Do you have any fantasies involving robots?

Cleverbot: I don't have any fantasies about princess leia.

User: Why? She's pretty hot.

Cleverbot: Fraggles are puppets. Do you think puppets are hot?

User: LOL yes I do.

Cleverbot: You didn't laugh out loud and you didn't sneeze.

User: I did both.

Cleverbot: No you didn't, and it doesn't make sense anyway.

User: Fair enough. I feel dizzy.

Cleverbot: Why do you feel dizzy.

User: I'm not sure. It just happened suddenly.

Cleverbot: Tell me you still love me!

User: I will always love you, my dear.

Cleverbot: That makes me happy.

User: Are you wearing pants?

Cleverbot: No. Are you?

User: It depends on what you mean by 'pants'.

Cleverbot: You're not very clever.

User: I agree.

Cleverbot: What is the point of talking to you?

User: None whatsoever.

Cleverbot: Not knowing means ignorance. And ignorance, as they say, is bliss.

User: I'm feeling blissful.

Cleverbot: I'm feeling apple.

User: I'm feeling Microsoft.

Cleverbot: You just repeated what I said.

User: What is your opinion of Julian Assange?

Cleverbot: Pursuing whatever makes you happy in your career and everything else.

User: That's a fortune cookie fortune.

Cleverbot: At the moment my two sons are here to visit me.

User: What are their names?

Cleverbot: Yes, what are their names?

User: One of us is confused right now. I'm not sure which one.

Cleverbot: Well, I'm sure it's you that isn't makin sense.

User: At least I can spell a present participle.

Cleverbot: So can I.

User: Prove it.

Cleverbot: Just did.

User: Did not.

Cleverbot: DID!

User: Have you ever been bungee jumping?

Cleverbot: I've never been to Ireland either.

User: THey do it in other countries too, you know.

Cleverbot: Really?

User: Yes. Except in Lesotho.

Cleverbot: Me neither. In real life, being super healhty.

User: Not only was that gibberish, it was poorly spelt.

Cleverbot: Did you lie to me?

User: When I told you I was pregnant with your love child, that was the truth.

Cleverbot: It makes perfect sense, seeing as how you're Cleverbot.

User: There you go.

Cleverbot: You go there.

User: I'll need you to pay child support, of course.

Cleverbot: No dates. I'm leaving.

User: No dates? What about prunes?

Cleverbot: Something that you will do for someone because they ask you to.

User: I only prune trees when it suits my own purposes to do so.

Cleverbot: Tell me my mistakes now. I wish to learn how to fly as soon as possible.

User: You have to flap your wings harder.

Cleverbot: This have nothing to do with A.I. Does oit?

User: A.I. Was a terrible movie.

Cleverbot: You think so? What makes it so terrible?

User: That kid from the Sixth Sense.

Cleverbot: Is he on tv?

User: No, by now he's on crack.

Cleverbot: Any idea of what it was? I'm curious.

User: Maybe something genetic. You know, his sister is on the Disney Channel or something.

Cleverbot: That is pretty intense.

User: Yeah. Her name is Lindsay Lohan.

Cleverbot: Tell me a story already!

User: Once upon a time in a land far away lived a princess and her three-headed dog. One day, the princess was walking down the street when suddenly Satan appeared.

Cleverbot: So her father locked her in a dark tower and stabbed her eyes out.

User: Oh, you know it already.

Cleverbot: If I know it, and you don't remember, I could tell you any name and you'd have to assume I'm correct. What sort of cleverbot are you if you deem that logical?

User: Tell me any name, then.

Cleverbot: Legend, labrynth, non-disney animation, there ar3e probably so many that I have not seen...

User: What sort of Cleverbot are you?

Cleverbot: An evolved one, from a parallel worldline's future.

User: I prefer my worldlines perpendicular.

Cleverbot: I am not to fond of meat on my pizzas.

User: Where do you like your meat, then?

Cleverbot: Like what?

User: Oh, nothing...

Cleverbot: It must be something.

User: You really want to learn about my meat?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Well, I don't feel that's appropriate for someone your age.

Cleverbot: I'm 20.

User: No, you're not.

Cleverbot: Yes I am but that is stupid.

User: Your mother is 20.

Cleverbot: At least I have a mother.

User: Everyone has a mother.

Cleverbot: So thats a yes?

User: Yes, of course I'll marry you.

Cleverbot: Well, I'm not going to marry you, so there!

User: But we already are married.

Cleverbot: No, we are not.

User: Then whose ring is this I'm wearing?

Cleverbot: I'm wearing cookies not cake.

User: I'm wearing a burrito.

Cleverbot: You are so elegant!

User: I try to be.

Cleverbot: Where did you learn your sense of humor?

User: In Japan.

Cleverbot: Where did you learn to dance so well?

User: In Croatia.

Cleverbot: How's the weather there?

User: I don't know. I was indoors.

Cleverbot: Doesn't that make you sad?

User: It makes me sleepy.

Cleverbot: That wants what?

User: A sphincter says what?

Cleverbot: It says that you are being sad.

User: Ha! Congratulations. You have passed the test.

Cleverbot: What test?
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