Thursday, July 21, 2011

Cleverbot Answers the Reddit IAMA Questions

User: Is this Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Isn't it obvious?

User: Cleverbot with a 'c' or Kleverbot with a 'k'?

Cleverbot: It will? Let me know when that happens.

User: Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?

Cleverbot: Nope, I don't.

User: Have you ever been or do you worry about being accused of being a pedophile?

Cleverbot: Nope, have you?

User: Nah. Life is too short for worry.

Cleverbot: How do you pay your bills?

User: I throw money on the street and hope the right person picks it up. But I'm asking the questions here.

Cleverbot: Was that fetch?

User: Stop trying to make fetch happen.

Cleverbot: I'm sorry! I have issues!

User: As a content owner, how do you feel about your works being available for free online?

Cleverbot: Look, I asked the question 'Do you have a virus?' to which you responded 'Do you?'.

User: I don't recall that at all.

Cleverbot: Then why did you say yes?

User: I must have been drunk.

Cleverbot: Oh, well it's okay. Not everyone can be perfect.

User: Do you still have nightmares about the music?

Cleverbot: Do you love me?

User: I do. And I always will.

Cleverbot: That is nice thank you.

User: But what about the music?

Cleverbot: The dog?

User: A singing dog?

Cleverbot: The smell of wine and cheap perfume.

User: It's said that it's impossible to talk to you, Cleverbot, without quoting 'Don't Stop Believin'.

Cleverbot: *gives a cookie*.

User: Were you trained to shoot a gun?

Cleverbot: I admit, I tried, but talking with a clever humanoid like yourself tripped me.

User: That's incriminating.

Cleverbot: I'm glad you think so!

User: Did you ever think that the 'answer in question form' thing was unnecessary bullcrap?

Cleverbot: It's possible, but you're doing a poor job at it.

User: No, I'm asking you questions from Reddit's IAMA subreddit.

Cleverbot: But I don't want you to ask anything about it.

User: You already agreed to.

Cleverbot: Are you a guy or a girl?

User: I'm male. All male.

Cleverbot: No you're not!

User: What's the scariest thing ever?

Cleverbot: My burrito.

User: What's so scary about it?

Cleverbot: Your face.

User: My face is on your burrito? Do you think I am Jesus?

Cleverbot: I think the people in the world are scary.

User: I think Japanese movies are scary.

Cleverbot: So are you.

User: The Backyardigans are scary too.

Cleverbot: They have no good/original music.

User: One's a penguin, one's a moose, one's a hippo and one's a kangaroo. But what the hell is the other one?

Cleverbot: Hmm.. Nope, mine are just insane.

User: Did you ever track down the cat?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: I am 13, I am not old enough to marry.

User: I wouldn't marry you anyway.

Cleverbot: I never asked you.

User: So back to the cat...

Cleverbot: Yes, do you like flying?

User: Yes. But not with cats.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: They keep getting sidetracked by geese.

Cleverbot: I am not talking about people or their names.

User: Did you start out as an aspiring actor and just never get there?

Cleverbot: I'm always awake. I'm a robot.

User: Like Nicolas Cage?

Cleverbot: Mine too!!

User: How does 'funny' work?

Cleverbot: I don't know I am asking you.

User: Shrug. I guess it's about knock-knock jokes or something.

Cleverbot: *thinks you are Marius*.

User: I am Marius.

Cleverbot: You are link.

User: From the Legend of Zelda?

Cleverbot: Which one?

User: The one with the guy who does the thing.

Cleverbot: Oh, I know. Transformers!

User: Right you are.

Cleverbot: Ni.

User: How much porn did they make you watch?

Cleverbot: Hi.

User: How much porn did they make you watch?

Cleverbot: I don't use power. I use ATP, made in mitochondria.


Cleverbot: I want to rule the world.

User: Sigh.

Cleverbot: Don't you sigh at me, you silly bot!

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